The wind thrashed around all night. We could hear through the double panes of windows and doors and through the walls of the house, battering away all night, at what I could not see. It’s always pitch dark outside. The lights are so far in the distance, and while one can make out the outlines, you couldn’t see any effects of the wind on structures, because they are so far away.
This landscape is not unused to wind, in fact they seem to be old pals and partners. There’s evidence of this partnership everywhere the eye wanders. From the windswept grasses to the craggy chiseled shorelines, and the stone ruins of the many castles.
In this rough landscape, how do the birds manage, I thought. Vain, vain man, or in this instance, woman. I had soaked some rice for the birds, and thought, softened it will be easier to eat and digest, and I could add it as a small treat for the birds. By 10:15 am, they were still not here. Usually they’re on cue after sunrise which has been hovering around 9:00 am. Never mind, I thought and put some out anyway. No takers. They did not show up at all. I did see them flying about further BBC afield, but none came near me.
Ditto the sheep. They’re usually hanging around about the house and looking in now and then. Today, even they weren’t interested in us. They were further away, possibly at the furthest field. So far away, I’ve never seen them go such distance before.
We had work to do, the car to load and head out, so I left it at that. No photos today. To be honest I was quite disappointed. I think they knew we were leaving. That’s how life goes, we’re all travelers. All animals have a strong sixth sense, that’s a fact of nature. It was a well deserved snub for me. How vain of me to think that I have to provide for them. My mother used to say God looks after the ants and why won’t he look after you? Another friend who was a little older to me, had once told me that I shouldn’t concern myself with the welfare of others as much as I do. That I take away from myself when I do. That I underestimate the grand design of the divine. That everyone is going through what they need to at any given time. And I am reminded of her words often. Old habits die hard. However, with age and maturity, and with some effort they can be reined in somewhat.
So that’s what happened today, a well deserved humbling of my ego, if I that’s the right word? Definitely self importance. The audacity to think I was indispensable? A visitor to the homeland or others and already making assumptions, micromanaging, and all those words that are used for people who think…or people who assume, like I did. As if I know it all.
In a way, it’s nice to know that I don’t. Don’t know it all. It’s not my responsibility. That’s liberating to know. For someone who is supposed to be at that place in life, where we look inwards, and have accumulated some wisdom, (which btw I have not) I should have know better. It was a good lesson. All my romanticizing of the birds and the sheep, was just that. The creatures of the wild are more pragmatic than us humans, though not without emotion. They know when to move on. From that I should learn a valuable lesson. Now I know, and for that I am grateful. Grateful for the experience and grateful for the realization. That’s a good thing to be thankful for!
Approaching Orkney, and looking ahead to the journey.
Veenu Banga
12/27/21
10:08 pm.
